So today we're going to talk about something I see everyone mess up.
Literally every fucking person doing game today fuck this up.
I see people do one of two things when girls aren't receptive off the opener:
They keep persistently doing the same dumb fucking shit, and thus rewarding the girls with MORE VALIDATION even though the girls are being bitchy
They walk away with their tail tucked between their legs like a scared little puppy
The first of the two may be a bit more honourable in my eyes, because at least you're trying.
However, it's still dumb as FUCK.
There is nothing that annoys me more than seeing guys persist with MORE VALIDATION.
Guys, listen up…
Persistance is a virtue, but persistance is not the same as nagging a girl.
Let's say someone tries to sell you something on the street and you say “thanks, not interested”.
And then they keep just talking louder and saying the same shit.
Do you get annoyed?
Yeah, me too.
And so do the girls.
Now, what do you do then?
Simply put: You PUNISH defiance.
Here's the thing guys, if you don't understand reward & punish, compliance & defiance, frames, levels.of investment, and general PSYCHOLOGY, you'll be forever doomed to only have sex with the girls who like you before you even approach.
And that's fine.
But if you're not above average looking you'll be sleeping with mainly average or below average women this way.
Look at the non-technical guys with good results, they're ALWAYS attractive.
However, when it comes to the technical guys, there are many of them who sleep with girls above their own level of looks.
And this is because understanding investment, compliance & frames will allow you to “punch above your weight”.
Look at Mr. Lindberg for example.
He's a pretty good looking guy, but he's pretty damn chubby and compared to the girls he sleeps with, he's doing pretty damn well for himself.
Just a little while ago he slept with 4 girls in 24 hours, all of which were WAY above his own level of looks.
One of which was married but waited with telling him until after (he felt sick after hearing this).
Oftentimes the girls me and him approach are anything but receptive, however, thanks to understanding frames and compliance momentum, we know how to turn this around and make the girls chase us.
But here's the problem with this stuff: It's not much information out there, and for us to exhaust the subjects of the Big 3 (Frame Control, Compliance & Investment and Storytelling), takes a solid 10-12 hours of each subject. Which is why it's so hard to break everything down in our free content.
And to be honest, it's still pretty damn hard to do in our online products too, even though we do pretty well.
The only place we've successfully been able to teach this is during our residentials where we offer a total of 35 hours of seminar and 90 hours of infield coaching, aside from the 24/7 chatting and hanging out with us.
But not everyone can afford a 6K program (which soon will be 8K and soon enough it'll be 15K).
I really wish there was a way for us to teach this at a larger scale for a cheaper price because the community truly need to understand this, however we can't do a higher student to instructor ratio than 2:1 without sacrificing infield coaching quality. And quality is everything to us.
It's really keeping me awake at night, trying to figure out how to teach this at larger scale so we could do it cheaper without ourselves not being able to keep the business running.
Sorry, side tangent.
In any case, here's a super effective little technical game tactic to converting no girls into AT LEAST maybe girls by punishing and shaming their bitchiness.
Last night out with students we ended up at a place called Utgert here in Budapest. It's a big, high end place with lots of hot girls, although rarely bitchy.
So after trolling around on the dancefloor with our new “shush opener” (which opens like nothing you've ever seen before btw, big and loud groups of hot girls dancing like crazy will stop dead in their tracks, start a conversation and leave the dancefloor with you within 45 seconds, it's incredible and the students are absolutely blown away with how easy they can interrupt huuuuge groups with such ease, it's amazing to watch and use), we head out to the smoking area.
We love being out here because it's a very, very big area, it's the size of a decent sized bar and super easy to talk because there's hardly any music and it's easy to move around (crowded but not too crowded).
So one of our residential students get ordered to open a set but he's adamant that they're too bitchy and it won't work if he does it, and he wants it demonstrated.
We usually like to have our students push through their fears but this guy is on a huge winning streak after originally having issues running out of things to say, staying in set long enough etc etc but has made a total transformation. He's been super confident lately and absolutely slaying, so it felt like a very genuine request to see it demonstrated rather that chicken out.
And to be honest, the girls did look very bitchy.
So I roll up slowly, knowing the students are watching along with a few guys from another company. I rarely get AA these days but being asked to demonstrate exactly how to win over the hottest and bitchiest girls in the venue after only coaching for last few hours and having zero social momentum felt a little stressful to be honest with you.
And the girls could feel it.
I failed bad.
Like, REALLY bad.
Both of them completely ignored me like I didn't even exist, which is pretty rich given I'm 6”2, weight 95 kg (200 pounds) and was fucking loud too.
But this didn't make me flinching for a second though, I sort of knew this would happen beforehand because I could feel myself not being 100% grounded in my approach.
However I knew I'd turn it around so now I suddenly got confident again (I got lots of belief in my ability to turn things around thanks to understanding these technical strategies).
“...why do you hate me so much, what the fuck did I ever do to you...who even raised you? Hungarians?!”
They start laughing and I disqualify both of them pretty hard and then start throwing hoops at them while locking in and taking over with some big and long stories I have.
I keep making them chase me for a while before bringing the students in and letting them game the girls.
So, let's break down what actually happened and why it worked.
The girls originally ignored me for yep reasons:
The got opened non-stop the whole night and we're annoyed with guys at this stage
I wasn't communicating confidence off the open
So they ignored me because even saying they have a boyfriend would be annoying at this stage after having already shot down two dozen guys.
This is called defiance, it's the opposite of compliance.
Most guys start persisting even more in the same direction at this stage, thus rewarding the defiance.
I punish in two ways:
I make fun of them.
I disqualify/neg then
I make fun of them by saying things like “I'm actually very shy and I'm going to go home and cry now”. I didn't do this on these girls but it's a pretty good one to use before disqualifying. This time I mostly disqualified. Don't ask me why, it just happened.
I disqualify by making it seem like they're weird and committed a social violation. But WITHOUT saying it.
Now, when I said “why do you hate me so much, what did I ever do to you”, that's in between mocking and disqualifying.
Because I say it in a very sarcastic way, and it's perceived as me making fun of the situation and not being affected AT ALL, aka being unreactive (which is attractive, most guys get very reactive here).
But the “what did I ever do to you” implies she's being very rude for no reason, but it's said in a way that communicates that I'm not butthurt but I'm rather judging her and implying that she's WEIRD.
Lastly I hit her (or them, but it was clearly directed to the hottest one) with a hard disqualifyer implying she hasn't even been raised right, that she's got no manners (who raised you, hungarians?) with a bit of humour infused at the end.
Now, these lines themselves aren't all that important, what's important is the principles that I explained.
The frames and the punishing.
Defiance - Punish
Punish with FRAMES. Don't be logical. Don't verbalize things like “you're being mean” or “I feel like you're not treating me right” or some other bullshit.
You gotta IMPLY this stuff with subtle frames and humour.
This is why frame control is so fucking amazing.
You can change the dynamic from being rejected to the girls being weird and not having manners.
You must understand the difference and importance of compliance/defiance, punish/reward, compliance momentum and INVESTMENT to be able to use the power of frames.
These two and then storytelling and you're good to go.
Elite level game.
No questions asked.
Proven again and again and again.
These are the Big 3 and they're ALL you need.
Anyway, hope you learnt something.
Go out and apply it now and I'll talk to you soon again!